Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize