I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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