I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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