Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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