My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
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This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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