ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize