in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize