Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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