i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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