one might say we're banned from that church
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
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She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
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Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
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