bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It's blow job season.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize