Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
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Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
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I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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