All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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