I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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