SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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