She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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