how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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