No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
FUCK WHALES
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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