All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize