We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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