Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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