Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize