he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
There was a lot of him and a little penis
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
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Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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