No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Tornado booty call.. dedication
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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