I want to stick my p in your. b.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
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That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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