Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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