I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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