What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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