I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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