I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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