Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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