I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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