i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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