When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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