hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize