Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize