I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
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i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
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I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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