i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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