3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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