no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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