Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
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But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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