If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
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He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
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Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
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