I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize