well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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