# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize