He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm bleeding and have questions
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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