Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize