i permit you to call me
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize