is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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