my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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